Out of the mouth of Babes #26

We're back again with some of the things that the boys have said and this time it is James again that takes centre attention!

 I need a plaster

Out of the Mouth of Babes #25

This week has been very much a week of James-ism’s; one liner’s or snippets of conversations that I wanted to share with you.

Nose Bleeds

With the weather changing James seems to be over sensitive with his sinuses. I am not sure if this is a Hayfever thing or if it is a seasonal asthma response but this last week he has had several nose bleeds.

You may think that this would be a worrying situation for him but it’s not:

James: “My nose is bleeding Daddy. I love it, it’s like my nose is crying”

Being in Control

James is currently going through and extended reign of being a dictator. Everything is his way or not at all but within this he has taken possessive stance over the TV controller. Whenever something is recorded and we are watching it he has to be the one using the controls!

Me: “Advert time!”

James: “Oh, it’s okay, I’m in charge I will reforward it for you!”

Me: “It’s fastforward James”

James: “It’s not. If you have to Rewind it you have to REforward it!”

Time Travel

We like to play a game in the car where is we spot a similar car to Daddy’s we shout “Daddy’s car *insert colour*. If you spot the same model you get one point, if you spot a daddy car that is exactly the same colour you get 2 points. It is a simple game and seems, somehow, to keep the boys entertained whilst I am driving.
This time, however, William spotted an exact car just pulling in front of us and potentially would earn himself 2 points:

William: “Daddy car, blue! 2 points!”

James: “That’s not fair!”

Me: “Well it is because he spotted it first”

William: “It even has the same registration as you. It starts with LV. Do I get more points?”

James: “Wait! It looks the same, it’s blue and has the same numbers? Then that means it’s not fair!”

Me: “Why?”

James: “Cos clearly that’s us in the future”

Bedtime Problems

I am extremely lucky with the boys and their bedtime routine. Apart from when we first moved and there were some unsettled routines and feelings our bedtime is runs like clockwork similar to Von Trapp family.

The boys have their unwinding hour and once that hour is up they give me a cuddle, kiss me goodnight and they head straight to bed and are asleep within minutes.

However, we have had our friend Ben spending some time with us recently. He tends to help out on our day trips and just give me that extra hand when and where possible.

On this one occasion Ben decided to stay into the evening so we could hang out after a rather eventful day. The boys had their unwinding hour, gave me their cuddle and went off to bed; Ben and I sat, relieved after a busy day and started chatting.

Five minutes later James walks in:

James: “Look, I can hear you talking. If you want me to wake up, come and join you then fine but you are keeping me awake. Can you stop?!”

*Closes the door very loudly and walks back off to his bed”

Guess that told us then!

Out of the Mouth of Babes #24

It wasn’t that long ago when the boys and I investigated about the emergency services and the importance of learning and dialling 999. This last week, however, has made me think we may have to cover this topic again, especially after conversations I have had with James.

Out of the Mouth of Babes #23

This week we have had conversations about our new car and some misunderstanding and mispronunciation that I wanted to share with you!

The New Car

This week I have finally got my new car. I have to admit that I love it and apart from learning how to drive again in a car that feels slightly alien to me, it is by far the best car that I have owned.

I have been telling the boys about the car for a long time and in fact they were the ones that helped me choose it.

However, it has taken a few months to finally get to me so I think that they had forgotten a lot of what the car looks like inside and out.

Out of the Mouth of Babes #22

This last week we have had a lot of Mum related conversations.

It is difficult at times to handle some of the conversations but there are some moments that make me chuckle.

I love our co-parenting arrangement and for the last 18 months it has been going very well. We have a good routine in place and the boys seem to have settled within it.

Do you know her?

Out of the Mouth of Babes #21

This has been a rather busy week around here but amongst the madness and hectic life the boys have come out with some...well....interesting things!

This week has really shown their innocence but also how William is developing an understanding of slightly blue humour too!

Wanting a bigger Sausage

Out of the Mouth of Babes #20

It is James’ birthday this Thursday so it seems only fair that this week’s Out of the Mouth of Babes is all from him.

Out of the Mouth of Babes #19

We’re back again this week with Out of the Mouth of Babes and this week the boys have been reminiscing over old photos, discussing what our tongue does and looking at what we should get when ordering a new car.

Reminiscing

The other day William was looking through photos from a camera that he had before and just after James was born. A few months later and his Mum and I separated so at just 2 and half years old he hasn’t really known anything different from then; the photos, therefore, were a revelation but not exactly a great one for me!

William: "Daddy I'm surprised by 2 things"

Me: "Oh, what's that then?"

William: "well firstly that you and mummy are together"

Me: "well you knew that Mummy and Daddy married"

William: "yeah but it's not as shocking as the other bit!"

Me: "what's that?"

William: "just how fat you were! And I mean you were fat!"

Cheers mate. Valid point and thanks for reinforcing the fact that I'm grateful for losing that 4 stone!

Home Ed – The Tongue

In Home Ed this week we have been investigation the tongue and our taste buds.

Me: “What do we use our tongue for?”

William: “We use it to talk and eat things”

James: “No, we use it to lick people and things!”

Me: “Are we meant to lick people and things though?”

James: “Yes, why else would I lick them?”

I don’t think James got the initial points in our investigation but at least I now know why he licks everything and everyone.

Choosing a new car

This week I have been looking at ordering a new car from the motability. We ended up looking around a couple of showrooms and a few different types of cars.

Me: “So what do you think we should look for boys?”

James: “A car with rockets!”

William: “No, that’s silly. We should get a car that flies and floats like Chitty Chitty Bang Bang”

James: “Yeah, you’re right I would like that as long as it has the erector (ejector) seat!”

Well, I think they will be greatly disappointed in the new car then!

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Out of the Mouth of Babes #18

So we are back this week with Out of the Mouth of Babes as it has been a great week for the different things that the boys have come out with!

We have had awkward questions, logic questions and just parent embarrassment!

Awkward

So we took a trip to the cinema this week to go and see Zootropolis, which both the boys and I enjoyed and I recommend that you guys go if you get the chance.

After the film had finished it was time for us all to nip to the toilets before we headed home. The boys went and then waited patiently for me; however they suddenly noticed something.

William: “Look James, what do you think that is?” (Pointing to the condom machine)
James: “I don’t know, but you have to put money in it. Maybe it is a toy machine”
William: “Daddy, what’s this for and can we use it?”

Now, I am not one to shy about talking about sex with the boys and will always be age appropriate but I didn’t think this was the best time for this conversation.

Me: “Oh, it’s not for children. That’s why it is high up on the wall so you can’t reach; It is only for adults. Have you two washed your hands?”

Luckily the boys hadn’t washed their hands so we got distracted. Have any of you had this question? What do you say?

Logic

James: "why do we say toilet and not toilet room? We say we're going to the living room not the living"

To be honest with this one, it had me stumped for a minute but mostly because I wasn’t expecting it and didn’t have an immediate answer.

Luckily Facebook came to the rescue and pointed out that it is the bathroom and the toilet is a part of it, like the sofa is in the living room; we obviously don’t say that we’re going to the sofaroom.

I did like his logic though!

Embarrassment

So there I am doing the routine top to bottom flat cleaning, music on high and singing fairly loudly when William came out to me.

William: "Daddy can you stop singing. It's an embarrassment to us as well as yourself"

When did their Dad singing become an embarrassment to a seven year old?! More importantly, he really did tell me off brilliantly; Felt like I was back at school again being told off by a teacher!

He phrased it so well though that I though I would stop for him!

Out of the Mouth of Babes #17

It has been a while but we are back with our Out of the Mouth of Babes.

So this week has brought a few different situations but I think I will start with Easter.

Sitting in the car on the way to church Easter morning:

Me: “The church will probably be busier than normal today because it is Easter”

William: “Is it because Jesus came back to life?”

Me: “That’s right; Easter Sunday is the day when Jesus came back to life. Do you know how he died?”

William: “Yes, he died on the cross but three days later he came back to life and did his magic for everyone!”

Well I thought that made sense enough for him.

Me: “Yes, that’s right so everyone wants to celebrate him coming back to life today”

William: “Do you think if I high five him he’ll do one of his tricks for me?”

Me: “What?”

William: “Well we are going to church to see him aren’t we, now that he’s back to life!”

Me: “Erm…..”

I think he has this image in his head!

The second situation is much shorter but left me in an incredibly embarrassing position!

So we are in Wilkinsons getting some bits for our various home school activities when out of nowhere James pulls down his trousers and shouts:

James: “Look at me willy!”

I don’t think anything else needs to be said on that....I just don't think he understood the "family" aspect of the store!

Out of the Mouth of Babes #16

We've been looking at our body in Home School this term trying to put together a body map.

In investigating our heart, pulse and what it does for us an interesting conversation between the boys happened:

Out of the Mouth of Babes #15

Following last week’s festive Out of the Mouth of Babes I thought I would give you some more festive conversations that the Boys have been having this week.

Out of the Mouth of Babes #14

With Christmas just over a week away then it is completely understandable that the Boys have been discussing a lot of things about it.

This, obviously, has meant that I have caught some fantastic conversations between the two and enough for me to share with you.

So my series “Out of the Mouth of Babes” has come back with some festive spirit!

Out of the Mouth of Babe #13

This weeks Out of the Mouth of Babes features both boys.

Out of the Mouth of Babes #12

This weeks post comes from James (4)

He has had some difficulty working out what is reality and what isn't:

Out of the Mouth of Babes #11

This weeks post comes from both boys.

We decided that our Sunday film would be the sequel to the Wizard of Oz, The Return to Oz. In watching it William had a few observations:

Out of the Mouth of Babes #10

Now I know it has been a while since I posted our Monday feature "Out of the Mouth of Babes" but between it being a miserable summer holidays here and a lack of routine the boys haven't actually come out with anything that I felt was post worthy.

Luckily, Home school is back and routine is restored and because of that it naturally came back.

This week we are concentrated on the things that James has pointed out.

Out of the Mouth of Babes #9

This week’s from “Out of the Mouth of Babes” comes solely from William:

 

Operation Stack

So we are driving along the road whilst William is watching all the cars facing in the opposite direction (luckily) stuck in a huge traffic jam.

 

William: “Daddy, when we went on holiday there was traffic jams just like this!”

Me: “Was there? That mustn’t have made the journey fun”

William: “They weren’t cars though Daddy, they were Lorries!”

(I now click on to what he was talking about: Operation stack)

 

Me: “I know, I bet there were lots!”

William: “There were lots and lots; much more than all these cars here! You know how big God is?”

Me: “Yeah”

William: “Well, I would almost say as big as big as Him.”

Me: “Wow! Almost that big!”

Williams: “I don’t understand it though Daddy. The Lorries are cuing because the men who let them through because they want more money and to make sure their jobs are OK.”

(Now, I was pretty taken back by this. I mean he’s 6 years old! I must have assumed that he has over heard a conversations.)

Me: “Yeah that’s pretty much the reason. What don’t you understand?”

William: “Well if they want more money and to make sure their jobs are ok, why are they having all these days off? Aren’t you meant to work to get money and keep their jobs?”

(I really had no answer. How could I explain industrial dynamics and then the added pressure of immigration to a 6 year old? How would you have answered that question?)

So there’s me now thinking and panicking but luckily my dear 6 year old comes out with this:

William: “I think it is ridiculous! It is almost as silly as Lex Luthor being a bad guy in Lego Batman! When he is Supermans Bad Guy!”

Me: (With a sigh of relief!) “That is silly, I wonder why he’s in the game!”

And with that the next conversation started!

Out of the Mouth of Babes #8

So we have just moved in and this has led to a lot of House related conversations.

 

(This isn't our flat)

William: Daddy are we going to your new house?
Me: Yes, but it's a flat and not a house.
William: But a flat has an upstairs?
Me: There is an upstairs but it's where other people live.
William: Why cant we go there if there's an upstairs?
Me: Because we don't live there!
William: Ok, so we don't have the upstairs? Then we are living in a Bungalow?
Me: No, a bungalow doesn't have an upstairs at all. This has an upstairs but we don't live there.

James: OK, its a bungalow/flat.

(I, by this point, have realised that it's not worth arguing anymore. It's not like we didn't have a whole term on houses and the different types as a Home School project!)

Me: Yes, it's a bungalow/flat.


Later that day and sorting the Boys bedroom out:

James: Daddy this is impossible!
Me: What is impossible?
James: Our bedroom is down stairs!! Our bedroom is next to the living room! This is amazing!

(I think the whole concept of us living in a flat has completely confused them!)

 

 

 

Taking Samson out for a walk around the new area:

 

 

 

James: Daddy I can't go any further!

Me: Why not? What's wrong?

James:  It's all wrong, I am running out of air!

Me: What do you mean you're running out of air? Just breathe!

James: I don't know how to around here!

 

 

(I then spent the next 5 minutes explaining that the air is exactly the same here as it would be anywhere! This coupled with showing him how to breathe again and that as we're not under water or in space that we are OK.)

 

 

Out of the Mouth of Babes #7

We took one of our little walks along the river front yesterday and this little conversation popped up. So I decided I would do this as this weeks Out of the Mouth of Babes rather than the one I had planned.

On our walk James spotted the cranes far off and this discussion happened: